What happened when man invented the wheel?
terriblejokes: A big revolution took place. Just one, though.
Me: Fuck wind.
Josh: You could at least take Wind to dinner first.
Josh: Is wind a whore or something?
Me: Well, Wind does blow everybody...
I don’t want to go home. It throws me into depression…
My enemies will not remain, nor will my friends remain. I shall not remain....– Santiveda, Bodhisattvacharyāvatāra (via anoctopussquatingonyourbrain)
joshuajosef: Temporarily ended my love/hate relationship with the largest of my distractions. To be honest, after about an hour, I’m not even sure if I want it back. Way more trouble than its worth. What about…the rest of the internet?
Cosmo Sex Tip #666
rappinpicard: When he’s least expecting it, carve a pentagram in his chest and begin summoning Satan.
Rule #1: Be attractive
Rule #2: Don't be unattractive